I took the boys to the park again this week. For those of you who may be wondering no I did not torture Chico by pushing him in the swing again. I did slide down the big twisty slide with him on my lap though, and he loved it.
I have to say that I was a little nervous up at the top looking down with my sweet baby on my lap. I couldn’t even see the end of the slide. How could I be sure it was safe for me? How could I be sure it was safe for him?
It’s incredible how much we change when we have children. When I was younger I thought I knew what faith was. I thought I had it. The faith that no matter what happened or where His path would lead that everything would eventually turn out all right. The faith that He would provide everything I need. The faith that hears a still small voice and walks forward without asking Him to repeat Himself just to make sure I heard correctly. It seemed simple. It seemed natural.
Add a husband and three small sons to the equation and it doesn’t seem as simple. I may be easy not to worry about what I will eat or what I will wear (ok so sometimes I worry about what to wear), but not worrying about what my boys will eat or if they’ll have clothes to protect them from the cold is much harder.
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you - you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
But the Lord has proven Himself to be faithful. And I am learning what I used to think I already know. To trust Him. Not only to provide for me, but to provide for my family. Not only to lead me in His path of righteousness, but to do the same for my boys. To get back to that place of hearing His voice and walking in it, without fear and without doubt.
And if that’s hard just check out what Jesus says in Mark 13:11.
Whenever you are arrested and brought to trial, do not worry beforehand about what to say. Just say whatever is given you at the time, for it is not you speaking, but the Holy Spirit.
To be arrested and not worry?
Lord grow my faith!